ideasthatspark - Connect
One Kid at a Time
Posted: Sep 3, 2009 4:43 PM
Updated: Sep 3, 2009 4:43 PM
Between everyone’s overloaded schedules and the daily drill of work, meal prep, laundry and homework, it’s hard enough to grab some uninterrupted time with your children, let alone do something special with each one separately. But if you can pull it off, the benefits -- for both of you -- are well worth the effort.
“Something magical happens when you spend a special day one-on-one with your child,” says Karen Deerwester, Ed.S., a parent educator and author of the upcoming book The Entitlement-Free Child (Sourcebooks Inc. 2009). “Whether your kid is a toddler or a teen, he craves nothing more than your full, undivided attention. Plus, this strategy actually helps decrease sibling rivalry.”
That’s exactly what happened when Gail Kraley’s 14-year-old daughter Bridget left home on a trip, and Kraley seized the opportunity to go on a unique outing with her youngest child, Alec, 11. This time, no one but Alec chose the activities. “We went to see a sculpture exhibit at The Metropolitan Museum of Art,” recalls the Brooklyn, N.Y. mom. “Alec chose the ‘cuisine,’ so we went for cheeseburgers and milkshakes.” It’s an experience Gail and Alec still talk about because it was shared just between them.
Having a memorable one-on-one outing doesn’t require much money -- just thought and planning. The only rule: Follow your child’s lead. Deerwester suggests keeping a “special day jar” for each child. Help him think of five things he wants to do together that year, write them on slips of paper and stuff them in the jar. Then, whenever possible, pull one out and make it happen. Also key: Don’t overplan. Anything that’s too costly, involves long lines or careful timing is a recipe for disaster. You have a better chance of success if you keep things simple.
No matter how much (or little) time you have, you can always find something special to do. Here are some easy, inexpensive ideas to get you and your child planning your own great escape:
Two hours Learn something new together. Spend an afternoon taking lessons in cake decorating, beaded jewelry making or snowboarding -- whatever interests your child the most.
Five hours Create your own after-school special. Surprise your child by picking him up after school one day and whisking him away to an afternoon movie and dinner afterward -- his choice of restaurant, of course. And if you still have room, top it off with a stop at the ice-cream store.
Overnight Book a room and visit an amusement park, museum or attraction within an hour or two from home. Stay in a motel with a pool, go to a diner for dinner and watch cartoons or movies on TV all night. (Note: You don’t have to leave town for this one. It’s special enough if you stay in a local motel and hang out while the rest of the gang remains at home.)
The weekend Take a road trip to relatives. Bring just one of your kids to visit Grandpa and Grandma and give him or her 48 hours of undivided attention from three adults. On the way, let your child pick the radio station -- so you can sing at the top of your lungs together -- and your pit stop for lunch. Have her choose a special activity and meal during your visit. After all, it’s all about your child…and sharing the moment together.
KATC.com is Social!
KATC Videos
Comments