A Little Romance Goes a Long Way
Posted: Mar 29, 2009 11:00 PM
Updated: Sep 3, 2009 4:43 PM
Say the word “romance,” and you probably envision clinking champagne glasses, little black velvet boxes and weekends for two in Paris. But grand and costly gestures don’t mean nearly as much as the simple, everyday ways you can show your partner affection. “Love is more than just a feeling inside,” says Joyce Catlett, co-author of Sex and Love in Intimate Relationships (American Psychological Association 2008). “You have to put actions behind those feelings, little acts that touch your partner’s heart and let him know, without words, that you love him.”
Keep the spark alive with these easy and inexpensive yet thoughtful moves. Aim to do one a day -- and you can put Paris on hold.
Stash love notes Tack a Post-it note with a sweet message on a briefcase, on the bathroom mirror, on the dashboard or even in a coat pocket, to bring a smile to your partner’s face. “Thinking of you” is all you have to say, but wax poetic if inspiration strikes.
Check in often Keep the lines of communication open throughout the day, even if you’ve got no news. Send e-mails, text messages, even cell phone photos showing a stunning sunset, rush-hour gridlock, or your desk splattered with the coffee you just spilled. It’s sharing the little things that keeps couples close.
Break out the china All you need for a romantic candlelight dinner is…candles. Feed the kids first, then drape a fancy tablecloth over the kitchen table. Pull out the china, stemware and candlesticks. It doesn’t matter if you’re cooking his favorite dish or ordering in pizza; the surprise setting will make it special.
Tune in to his state of mind You don’t have to be a mind reader to pick up on your partner’s mood -- you just have to tune in to it. Acknowledge his state of mind (“You seem anxious…”) and ask him about it (“Is everything okay?”). He’ll know you really care.
Ease his load Surprise your partner by picking up the dry cleaning, taking out the recycling or doing another chore that usually falls to him. It may not seem romantic to unload the dishwasher or get the car washed, but it shows that you care.
Really listen We’re all guilty of watching TV, reading the newspaper or chatting away on the phone during the few hours we have with our partner during the week. For a change, give a conversation your undivided attention.
Be touchy feely Physical contact is a building block of intimacy. Link arms while you’re walking, rest your head on his shoulder or give a quick squeeze as you go by. Casual tender moments help you rediscover your chemistry.
Get passionate about his passion Join your partner in an activity he loves. Nothing shows your romantic interest more than a willingness to engage in your partner’s other love, whether it’s karaoke, cooking or poker.
Say thank you It doesn’t matter if you show it or tell it -- as long as you find ways to let your partner know you appreciate him every day.
Kiss him Give him not just a peck on the cheek, but a real smooch for a good five seconds, whenever you say hello and goodbye, good morning and good night. Romantic lip-locks are a delicious reminder that you love him…and he loves you back.
